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Unidentified Uterine Object

November 25, 2008

A lot has gone on in the last week. I’ve had my share of poking and prodding and it actually went ok, minus one mini meltdown. I’d pretty much had my fill of injections, detections, inspections, and neglections after the last IVF, so I wasn’t in a big rush to have my body messed with for awhile. When I finally got around to getting my teeth cleaned by my sadistic super-anal dental hygienist, I was chastised for not having gone for 10 months. Needless to say, I did not elaborate on the infertility massacre with the four part harmony and the twenty seven three-by-four glossy ultrasound pictures with the circles and arrows and the paragraph on the back of each one. But I didn’t come here to write about my dental health today.

I went to the big-shot fertility clinic yesterday to get more inspections, detections, and neglections. I got the ultrasound, the 3-D ultrasound, the uterine artery blood flow check, and the antral follicle count. I hadn’t had three out of four of these last things for my last cycle at the “clinic-across-the-tracks”, and it didn’t seem to matter as neither my uterus nor my eggs were the problem. I passed the uterine-artery-blood-flow-whosiecallsit, failed the antral follicle count, though they were nice enough not to say it in those terms, and found a mystery blob in my uterus, though it’s “so far away that it won’t be a problem for pregnancy”. So somewhere out there in the universe of my uterus is an Unidentified Uterine Object. The baby-faced Dr. G, who looks like he just graduated from college, couldn’t tell me for sure if it was a fibroid or what. At least he gave me the same answer as Dr. W did two months ago and yesterday’s ultrasound tech, who I think was also in the Class of 2008 along with Dr. G. It hasn’t gotten any bigger in the last two months, so I guess I’ll keep doing what I’ve been doing.

In defense of my ovaries, I’d like to clarify that I personally don’t think I failed the antral follicle count. I’m 42, and I think seven is a very respectable resting follicle count for my age, thank you very much. Oh, they would want me to do a clomid-challenge-test for them, to which I’ll probably reply something eloquent like, “up yours,” or calmly point out that I think we have enough information about my ovaries after one clomid challange test, one IUI cycle with clomid, and two IVF cycles with different protocols. Besides, clomid makes me crazy, and you don’t want to see me crazy do you??!! That’s already caused enough problems.

Anyways, let’s not put the cart before the horse, shall we? I still have frozen embryos that I need to decide what to do with. I won’t be making any decisions before December 12th. That’s the date I find out if the buyer for my house gets their loan, and the same date I have the reading with the baby psychic. Do not attempt to adjust your computer screen. You read that right. I’ll be having a phone reading with Walter Maki.chen author of the book “Spirit Babies”. I need specific information and I believe he can give it to me.

15 Comments leave one →
  1. WiseGuy permalink
    November 26, 2008 1:01 am

    Did they tell you what that object maybe? Keep posted!And did you razor-edge your sense of humour? I like that.

  2. Geohde permalink
    November 26, 2008 2:43 am

    I think you’ve got some very good points to have much fun times arguing with your clinic over.Or perhaps it’s just me that enjoys jousting with my fertility clinic 🙂J

  3. Wishing 4 One permalink
    November 26, 2008 3:38 am

    Wow a baby reading, interesting….Well sure hope your buyer gets their loan, will be wishing for you.

  4. Kristin permalink
    November 26, 2008 8:31 am

    Good luck deciding what the next step is.ICLW

  5. Lost in Space permalink
    November 26, 2008 2:02 pm

    Phoebe, not that it matters, but I am proud of you for going back. You had such a rough time with your first Dr. G meeting so I know just going was not an easy thing for you to do. You have an indescribable strength.I would detest the Clomid challenge too. I don’t see what additional information it will provide at this point.I hope all goes well with the loan for your buyers and you are able to move forward with everything.I am curious to hear more about the psychic appointment.

  6. Amy permalink
    November 26, 2008 2:30 pm

    Good luck as you move through this process.ICLW

  7. IdleMindOfBeth permalink
    November 26, 2008 2:55 pm

    Best of luck to you as you figure out your next steps.ICLW

  8. DAVs permalink
    November 26, 2008 4:18 pm

    Thanks for the nice comment on my blog.I, too, had an “unidentified” something in my uterus, found by Dr. G. Actually, he quite confidently said it was a polyp that needed to be removed. Back at home, I went in for the surgery and, you guessed it, nada. But I think I told you that story before.At any rate, I will anxiously await your psychic reading. I feel the need to talk to this guy, too, though I haven’t read the book. If you’re up for sharing, please do.Hope you have a nice holiday!

  9. The Muser (aka Beautiful Mama) permalink
    November 26, 2008 8:42 pm

    Oh, best of luck, Phoebe. I hope you get the info you need and that the loan comes through!

  10. Pepper permalink
    November 26, 2008 9:58 pm

    There’s so much I love about this post, from the Unidentified Uterine Object to the baby-faced doctors. Truly. Love it all. And I’m now intrigued about the baby psychic and can’t wait to find out what he says. Is it December 12th yet?BTW – Thanks for the comment on my blog. Your idea of taking the used sharps to my clinic and surrepticiously disposing of them there seems to be the most convenient, practical option thus far. Hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

  11. retro girl permalink
    November 27, 2008 5:41 am

    Thanks for visiting my blog – I’m getting up to speed with your previous posts. I noticed you said in this post that you need to make a decision about your frozen embryos – so do we. I have no idea where to start with that…so if you have any insights, let me know!Have a great holiday.

  12. Faith permalink
    November 27, 2008 6:55 am

    Baby psychic? Unidentified ultrasound objects? Mocking your clinic? I love your blog already. Here from ICLW.

  13. alicia permalink
    November 27, 2008 4:27 pm

    wow how weird that they didn’t tell you what the blob was?? ohh i hope you can stay away from clomid, it is sooo evil I agree!here from iclw

  14. Dora permalink
    November 28, 2008 10:51 pm

    Love the Alice's Restaurant reference. Very appropriate around Thanksgiving.I would suggest a hysteroscopy before a FET to see what's hiding in your uterus. Really no biggie. I had a polyp removed and a D&C during mine. I took the next day off, but I really didn't need to.ICLW

  15. Duck2 permalink
    November 29, 2008 12:09 pm

    Be proud of your follicles, at the ripe age of 29 I had 4 in my v. first follicle count and nadda when i did my ivf cycle (in the end there were eggs, they just couldn’t see them in the beginning).hope the UUO goes away.

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